Twenty (Hypothetical) Questions...

Today is a squall of a day snow-wise, and we have had the urgency of having to deal with the collapse of our dear cat with a heart problem at the tender age of almost 11 - Bless him, he had the life of Riley in our home, and he will be sorely and sadly missed.




I prepared this yesterday, so please forgive me just stuffing it in - There are another 20 Questions, which will follow demain...


I can't even remember where I found this Meme.

Suffice it to say, I don't think it's anyone's who might trouble this portal!

Apparently, it'll only take ten mins to do this Meme, I'm told, but you know it didn't!

Feel free to fill it in yourself, you know you want to!


1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

Any war-monger - Go on, name just one - I'll bet you can't...


2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?

Out of existence in music, but not of life - Lily Allen - Mockney Princess...


3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

An ex-boss of mine who had a troubled life with a criminal for a husband, and who took it all out on her staff - She was the archetypal, bullying, howling mad, manager. And it's taken years of my life to get over working with her. She was awful to everyone, and took turns to berate one person at a time - I think it was just the women, really - but I endured it once, then asked for a transfer to an office nearer to home, and used the excuse it was because it was nearer to my childcare. This wasn't a lie, and there was no other way out... so I took it, and I've never looked back. She was rewarded handsomely for leaving the service, when staffing cuts were required, and moved on, I hope, to where she could do less damage to others...


4. What is your favourite cheese?

Any apart from Blue Cheese - I will even scoff Pont L'Eveque, which smells horrendmouse, but I developed a taste for it while as an au pair in that part of Normandy!


5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?

Hummous and green olives on a crusty French baguette - Just don't come too close to me afterwards!


6. You, Elvis and Princess Diana are in a dog sled, fleeing across the Siberian wastes with wolves in hot pursuit. The wolves are catching up fast. Who would you throw out to gain speed and why?

This is an awful question, and I'm not answering it on the grounds of taste...



I saw Princess Diana once, when she came to open an Old Folks' Home near the factory offices in which I was then working close to London.

Not an avid royalist, I refused to clamour to see her with the crowds of employees, but a meagre couple of us eventually dragged ourselves away from work to wait by a wire fence at the edge of the factory grounds to see her entourage pass.

What impressed me about her most, was that she made real efforts to lean right over to the opposite side of the car so that she could see us and wave and smile to us properly - I've seen many others who would not have troubled themselves to do that - She had a heart and a good soul and the system of our monarchy (and the press) failed her, in my opinion.

Does that mean I would be chucking Elvis out of the dog sled?



7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?

Him, lucky?! That's saying something about me! I guess it would be... ummmm...



But I have a story to tell about this one!

While an au pair in Paris and Normandy in around 1984, I was given a day off with a German friend of mine, who was also an au pair, this time to my employer's sister. We spent the day at the American Film Festival at Deauville. It was fabulous and we probably saw five films including the film, and public, debut of Kim Basinger in The Natural, which starred Robert Redford and Glenn Close.

Susanne and I were out on the sunny, sand swept, streets of Deauville trotting about between film venues, when we realised that the limo passing us contained Rock Hudson, flanked by two very glamorous blondes. Rock was there to open a tribute to the films of George Stevens, including Giant, with James Dean.

We followed the limo, dressed like a pair of tramps, for we were ne'er do well students, and watched Rock get out of the car and walk up the steps of a swanky hotel into a press conference. In those days, there was very little security, and so Susanne and I sneaked into the back of the ballroom, employing sheer curiosity and bravado! It wasn't until people started asking questions of the famous Hollywood star, and we tacitly realised that we stuck out like sore thumbs, as we were holding neither mic' nor camera nor pencil and pad, and a couple of the journos were staring inquisitively, so we slunk away like the wannabes that we were, laughing hysterically at our derring do!

8. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?



Nah, nah, nah! In all reality, I'm finding this really difficult, because I don't ever think I'd be in this position, so I don't have a 'fallback position'!

Oh, hold on... I guess I'd have to be younger, and he'd have to be sedated, but I do have a soft spot for Dave Grohl!


9. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy crap, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?

A gift to charity - Or a handbag - I would honestly be torn between the two, if I could not return the money to whoever had dropped it first - I'm that kind of honest...




10. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

New York - I've never been, and I'd love to have the chance to see the art there, catch a Yellow Cab, visit the Empire State Building and take the ferry on the river, and even perhaps visit one or two shops - Who knows?!


11. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?

Did anyone mention a handbag? This one's a fake, but it's a bit of fun...


12. Your dream date. Who, where and why?

See 7. and 8, Maxim's Paris!


13. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?

Margaritas - I scarcely ever drink them, so it is a treat, and there are vitamins in the lime, right! It counts as one of your 5 Fruit & Veg per day, non?! I am nil by mouth in terms of alcohol at the mo', pending my back op, so this looks very inviting indeed!




14. Okay; girls and gay guys stand over here; guys and lesbians over there (I know and love my readership) …

Girls and gay guys first: You're in bed with Marilyn Monroe, Doris Day and Salma Hayek. Who's gonna be the lucky girl? (you're only allowed one).

And similarly, guys and lesbians: You're in bed with Cary Grant, Paul Newman and Johnny Depp. Who's gonna be the lucky guy? (again, you're only allowed one).
Give your reasons.

What's the obsession with this Meme and sex?! Doris - She could sing me to sleep with Once I had a secret love..., and I would let her dogs get on the bed too!


15. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-travelling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you travelling to and what are you going to do when you get there?

Georgian England, with a toothbrush and toothpaste - no bark for me to brush my pearlies! I would look for Mr Darcy proper! He was real, wasn't he?


16. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

Decency to one another, oh and 'Love the one you're with!'



17. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?

Travels with my rants... Enabling people to properly debate the issues of the day, sensibly, and not like on Jeremy Kyle...


18. What is your favorite curse word?

I wish I could say it were something innocent like "pants!", but it isn't...


19. You have a choice of two doors, one of which you MUST go through; the first leads to a roomful of spiders, the second to a roomful of clowns. Which is it to be?

Clowns - no contest...


20. Your house is on fire! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object (that's "inanimate" … leave your kids to burn; you know you want to). So what’s the item?

Probably my handbag (or purse for our cousins over the pond...) - A handbag? I'd guess you'd need evidence of identity, access to cash, and our passports, just in case you had to flee the country with a blanket over your head, before being arrested for fraud... Did I say that out loud??!



And with a free hand, I'd nab the oil painting we have of an old open Dutch barge boat and its passengers, including a clergyman reading from his bible, in a storm. It is 'after' an old Dutch master, painted by a family friend of my OH, GJ and is absolutely irreplaceable because he is sadly no longer with us... It was a wedding present from him to us, after we tried to buy another of his paintings (a pansy in a glass of water - in sepia) from an art gallery, then found it was one he hadn't wanted to put up for sale. When he found out about our disappointment, he was happier to part with the Dutch painting...