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Monday, 28 September 2009

Teenage Terrors...and the Fridge as Punch-Bag?

wacky David Cerny statue of St Wenceslas riding an upside down horse in Lucerna Pasaz, Prague - we totally stumbled upon this sculpture looking for a Jazz Bar one night :) Pictures, Images and Photos

I first posted this over at my other blog-share, Mad Manic Mamas back in early August... I know some of you might not visit it, for you may not relate to our horrific tales and manic celebrations of Parenting Teens, so I hope you don't mind me re-visiting this subject here because I liked the post, and I was doing the wailing banshee thing again a short while ago, when Grizz failed his driving test for the second time, and came in to the house furious, and punched the fridge...

Still, and bizarrely, the light within the fridge started working again for the first time in six years, so 'Every cloud has a silver lining...', eh??!

You'd like living with me, you would...

There's never a dull moment in the Fhina household, I should cocoa!

"Teen Terrorists turn your life upside down... They do!

One morning you are pressing out Playdough shapes with a cookie cutter, and pretending to have a tea-party with a woodland full of stuffed bears and rabbits....

...You are wondering when the next episode of Postman Pat is on TV, or Thomas the Tank Engine with Ringo narrating - Because it is the 'be all and end all' of their wonderful, energetic, fabulously adorable little lives...

The next moment, you are SCREAMING LIKE A BANSHEE out the back door after them, as they run for the school bus, late as usual...

You're reminding them, albeit FAR FROM GENTLY, that they ABSOLUTELY MUST go to the Sixth Form Study Centre TODAY to register for UCAS, or else they WON'T HAVE A CAT IN HELL'S CHANCE of ever getting a place at University next autumn; Even if THEIR will IS strong enough to win against the establishment through SHEER STUBBORNNESS...AND they don't even CARE that you got a LETTER home from the Head Teacher saying that this was IMPERATIVE, and that YOURS was THE ONLY CHILD IN SCHOOL STILL TO REGISTER!

...And just the other morning, when you were putting in your new daily contact lenses at the kitchen bench, because it offers the best light in the house, and you blinked the liquid away, and you focused on the middle distance, and suddenly you realised that he was standing right next to you, silently, in all his naked glory, waggling an ear-bud in his ear, dampened and glistening from the shower...

Quickly, you check that the New Mum Milk Lady isn't outside on your doorstep, copping an eyeful of his man-like, David, beauty, while waiting for her payment for the week's milk delivery, juggling the bairn with the semi-skimmeds! ...And you thank the angels that the neighbours aren't gawping at the soap-drama unfolding before them through your (unusually for you, Fhina!) fantastically clean windows...

And you comfort yourself that no stray country birdwatchers ('Twitchers') have their high-powered lenses trained on your kitchen window...

Statue of David Pictures, Images and Photos

Because there he is, in all his glory... As naked as the day he was born...

And what goes through your mind is whether you could still pin a nappy (diaper /napkin for our Over the Pond listeners!) on his ass - The great 6' 4" galoot that he is!

Oh, life was far simpler then... Wasn't it? When you could exert a little more control over their lives... And they weren't continually 'upping the ante'...

And you looked more like this... 'Armless...

Venus Pictures, Images and Photos

...and far less like this veritable banshee..."

banshee Pictures, Images and Photos

11 comments:

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Parenting teens is so much fun... never a dull moment!

Elizabeth Bradley said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Elizabeth Bradley said...

My baby is nineteen and 6'2", his dad's 6'4", so we'll see. Teenagers can liven the house up, that's for sure.

Susan English Mason said...

Mine is 19 and 6 foot 4. He has to duck or crack his head on just about everything everywhere. He seems to be buckling down in college; and not playing near as many video games or dungeons and dragons. Where did the time go? I want it back.

French Fancy... said...

Now and then when I get a little soupcon of regret that I don't have kids (it doesn't happen that often - maybe once a year) I think of mums of teenagers, fall down prostrate and give thanks.

It will get better - everything will. Just hang in there.

x

Carolina said...

Although I have no children, I recognize your story from the stories of my sister who has an 18 year old son. It's the same all over the world I guess ;-)

Jinksy said...

Thw last pic proves screaming is bad for the hair!

Jewels said...

LOL. I love this post! What a good way to start a Monday.

Grumpy Old Ken said...

Thank god I'm old and retired. Lovely blog tho.

Brighton Mum-Teenage Angst said...

Oh, don't I sometimes wish for my 'babies' back, sleepless nights and all! Great post, I have 3 tall Teenage boys, so understand exactly what you mean.

blognut said...

I feel for you, Fhina. You know I get it, right? I've got these two teenaged girls in the house and I go from moment to moment trying to decide whether to hug them or hurt them. :)

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