Cleaning house, a missive from below stairs...

This week I have been mainly resting my bones, as my hubby went down with an episode of bursitis, which is more commonly known as 'Housemaid's Knee'.

Sure, the man pushes the Dyson about the floor from time to time, does some of the cooking, makes up the fires and has taken to cleaning out the ratties when I used to do it far more quickly...

But Housemaid's Knee?   Come off it!

Still, it's been a week of reflection for me, while trying to make him comfortable in his swollen agony, which allowed me to spend a little more time in Blogworld than I normally would.   Which is nice.

In other news:-

1.   I rescued a confused pigeon (or 'flying rat' as my ex-brother-in-law, the eminent psychiatrist  used to say!) from the window of a shop.   Noticing the pigeon behind the glass, coo-ing out at me, I understood he was not destined to be a part of the cheap but cheerful window display.   Unless I've missed something and live pigeons are very 'in' this season!

Between the cheery, if surprised, shop assistant and me, we guided the little critter out of the shop, she wafting the shop's brochure and me using my weighty, book-filled college bag as shepherd's crook, while simultaneously trying so not to wreck her window decor of sofas, TVs and empty X-Box boxes.

Bizarre, non?!

The only-slightly-dazed crazed creature left us with no words of thanks as it shimmied out of the door back into the street.   "There's our good deed for the day", I shouted to her as I re-joined the drab grey street, smiling...    I was left wondering if it had wanted to rent an HD TV to enjoy the Christmas viewing schedules.

2.   After your wise and kind words on my last post, I took my anger to therapy.   It was a good place to leave it, while discovering that we learn more from challenging people, more than we ever learn from those with whom our interactions are mainly plain-sailing...   Worth knowing.

3.   At the weekend, we had a stellar falling-out with a friend of many years, who thought it was a blindingly good idea to park his dilapidated campervan on our land for up to two years, in payment for which he'd put down some hard-standing and do some gardening and tidying-up on the plot.   This is a man not known for keeping his word, as others in his manipulative family tend to have more pressing demands upon him.   They are the bane of his life.   Accordingly, he gets easily distracted by his and their compelling issues and, all too rarely, completes any job he sets his sights upon, frustrating his casual employers to say the least.

In his plans I could see only problems ahead for us, culminating in him not managing to carry out any of the promised work, while having his van become our problem and be a constant reminder - to me at least - of unfinished business lying between us.

I have enough unfinished business in my life at the mo' sans taking on anyone else's.   Of course, I am the ogre of the piece for having refused him.   He cannot see that his failings and/or burgeoning paranoia are his problem, not everyone else's.

I, on the other hand, know everything!

3.   Meantime, to cheer my spirits, I watched two of my favourite films, click on the links for more information, mes bloggy cinephiles - Mr Blanding Builds His Dream House and Blithe Spirit.   Pure escapism.   How bloody lovely!   There is something relentlessly reassuring about old films...

When I grow up I want to be Madame Arcati.   That's if I can't marry Mr Cary Grant.

4.   Of course, I'll never get my fantasy man when I leave the house without my trusty make-up bag which I'm never without, and take to using a pink Sharpie pen as lipstick in some desperate, slattern-like attempt to look less monstrous for a meeting!

5.   Finally, (you sigh), I'm off for some more training this weekend for my wedding celebrant work - Wish me luck!   Things may be a little quiet here - At least until after the weekend, but then I seem to be mainly posting weekly or twice-weekly at the most here at present.   I honestly don't know how I ever managed to hold down a full-time job!

Isn't the golden autumn light beautiful at this time of year?    Mwah!

The seasons shift...

Thank you those of you who have made comments about the wee Ratties.   Yes, they are adorable, yes, they 'oui oui' everywhere but everything they touch gets washed very regularly.   Yes, they have stolen my heart.   Well, what was left of it anyway!   And, Chairman Bill, when I Googled 'Dumbo Rats', they look suspiciously like my wee beasties, so I think that's what we're caretaking for the lovely Lisa B.

And, for what it's worth, Chairman, my views on rats as pets are such:   When thinking of A Rat (Singular) for your son as a pet I would recommend Two Rats (Plural - Male - Slower and easier to catch than the Female of the Species - so I am reliably informed.   They do seem to like the company of other rats to cuddle up to, play with, scrap with, and so on...  Already this morning, they've been doing synchronized skritching!

In other news, I think the Ratties are brain-washing me.   Or something has shifted in me. 

Perhaps it's the seasons, who knows?

I have started to clear my house.   Yes, after many years months of being a bit of a slattern Bohemian, I am starting to fill skips boxes with shit treasures and I'm also just chucking other rubbish out...

What, you may ask, has happened to me?   What has made such a difference?   What's caused this shift in fact? 

This week it's half-term in England and, rather than having to be some place doing some thing, I have been mainly lying on the sofa at home.

Therefore, I've had a bit more energy; I've also had more time than usual for ME and I've finally felt like tackling a number of the areas around the house that have been neglected while I recovered from a number of things:   From my back injury, and the surgery aftermath that first brought me to blogging, as well as a fug of grief that descended upon me following the death of my beloved Dad four and a half years ago.  

So, I am taking things in hand...   I won't say that I've won the battle yet.   No. 

There's still much to be done.

I could open a bookshop.   I have managed to donate around a dozen bags and boxes of clothes and other stuff to charity, which I am permitting myself to feel quite glowy and virtuous about.   The cheery chappies rolled up in their van this morning and took it all away.   Painless!

...You may know that charities are currently suffering a severe lack of interest in their business and a dearth of donated goods, reason being that we're probably in the worst depression since The Depression. 

This time, the British Heart Foundation has benefited.   It  is a charity I care to support, given that both of my parents suffered heart disease. 

I do support other charities, including the vitally important Great North Air Ambulance service that covers our rural area, but I do try to share the bounty as far as possible, between home and abroad...   My husband sponsors a doctor in Africa through VSO.

What has helped me most perhaps, in deciding to make way in my home, is the therapy - Through it, I am beginning to gain some insight into my rather 'stuck' behaviour(s).   Also I've acknowledged (if only to myself) that I was waiting for someone to 'rescue' me from it all.

This is unlikely ever to happen, let's be honest.   I have to rely upon me.

I've also begun to recognise how much all this clutter and stuff is holding me back from being wholly comfortable with my surroundings.   The ensuing feeling of shame is not a good one to hold to me.

I think I've also held on to stuff as a barrier to/defence against having guests over.   ...My out-laws mainly.   I'm not ashamed of that.   They're not easy people...   p.s. it worked!

What has also spurred me on is watching episodes of 'Hoarders' on TV, and realising how easy it is to tip over into those kinds of horrific states...   And also noticing just how 'stuck' these people are - With grief, with loss, with bitterness, with sadness, with loneliness, with anger...   Or just plain stuck.   Recently, it's been like holding a vaseline-smeared mirror up to my face, seeing a gauzy reflection there.

I've also been reading this book by former Monsoon singer, Sheila Chandra, on my Kindle.   It's full of common sense, and a 'been there, done that' mentality, rather than preachy words.   It has helped although I haven't worked through the programme fully to date. 

I'm just scratching the surface at the mo'. 

One of my next blog-posts will be a Bucket List of stuff that remains to be done, or accomplished, or realised by me.   (p.s. The Kindle has made me think about letting go of some much-loved 'physical' books too).

I've also been reading some blogs about Minimalism.   Not that I'd ever subscribe to being a minimalist, I must admit.   I'm not that radical:   Reading of how people have given animals away as if they were unwanted possessions saddens me, I have to say... 

I'd love to hear your thoughts on aspects of how to live life in a lighter way? 

Lawdamussy, how I've rambled on today...

Anyhoo, back to the clutter-busting.   I feel it's time.    I think I owe it to myself...   Don't you?!

This video shows Sheila Chandra from her Monsoon days with Ever So Lonely (1982):