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Sunday 21 October 2012

Moments in life...

This week I have been nursing a humdinger of a cold.   It has made me spend almost a day in bed and many more hours sitting around feeling not so much miserable, but a bit frustrated that it doesn't appear to be shifting very quickly...

Before that, I was on a bit of a high, given that I heard I'd been made reserve candidate in the second job I'd gone for - It did wonders for my self-esteem that I had come second in a job that I felt I'd love.   There's a six month probation period for the successful candidate, so if it doesn't work out for her then the job may still be mine.   I took some comfort in that, after so many months of applying for jobs and not hearing nottin'.

Latterly, we held a little informal ceremony for the infirm ratty I mentioned in my last post who sadly passed last weekend.   He joined his brother in the front garden, carried in a linen shift, and I picked a few blackberries and a small apple from the tree to help him on his way, this next  stage of his journey, little sweet, cheeky thing that he was.

The weather meantime has been intermittently sodden in Northumberland, with rivers flowing full to bursting, and autumnal bright.   On two evenings the mist has rolled into the valley, swathing fields and trees in white gauze, bringing a fresh dampness with it and a gleaming crescent moon.

I'm trying to notice things more.   To be mindful.   I advocate that my anxious clients connect to their mindfulness, seeing beauty where they might otherwise have rushed through, overwhelmed with thoughts and deeds.   A red leaf, tinged with gold.   The tricolours showing on a green bush.   The white hindquarters of a flitting deer, vanishing into the hedgerow in front of my car.   

I strive for my clients to connect more closely with themselves, to be more real.   And so I felt it was time enough for me to begin to practice what I so dearly preach.

Of course, with the shoe on the other foot, I noticed two toddlers travelling in a double decker buggy passing by me in the crowded city streets just the other day, as I sat down  in the sunshine to eat a hummus and falafel wrap on a bench that's also a work of urban art, with words by Julia Darling, late of Newcastle, whose grave I mentioned recently...   I didn't know that until I just googled the bench - I shall try to be more watchful in future...


I was thinking how lovely they looked, the babies - How interested in the life that they were passing through, and then I noticed the set and grim criminal features of the mum and dad pushing the buggy.   The image that came to me was that these boys would be likely to grow up to be the next Kray Twins.   Nature versus nurture in action.    I felt the chill of the day through the sunshine and thought about how judgemental I can be.   


...And mental too!

I have been listening to this, this sunny but cold Sunday, while my neighbour hammers wood into the ground somewhere on his property, like a demon - Oh, I can feel it in my bones...   And Alfie's voice is like balm to my troubled soul.   I adore this song.



Be mindful, peeps!


Beautiful photography of Northumberland by Andrew S. Gray.com - PLEASE CLICK ON LINK TO GO TO HIS SITE

8 comments:

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

Hope your cold gets better and your neighbor will stop hammering soon, although, I suppose that your neighbor will run out of steam sooner than that nast bug you have.

I liked your videos. It was very soothing for a Sunday afternoon.

Suldog said...

Living in the moment is something many don't do. It's a shame, really. There is always something interesting happening, in every moment and in every place, and never a reason to be bored.

Pull Your Socks Up! said...

I know how much you were hoping for that job and it's a real boost for one's confidence to know you're a top candidate:). Thank you for saying hello to Owly, he's such a darling:). I do worry about the future of tiny tots I see out and about too. Today I was waiting for quite a while in the chemist for some meds. There was a man with a really cute under-two lassie who was looking cold and grubby. When they left I noticed her dad had just sat her on the front seat. That's it. No child restraint in the back seat, just plonked her on the passenger seat without a seatbelt. Oh dear. Anyway I'll get off my soapbox now. I do hope you get over your cold quickly, it does sound like you're taking the time to think about the important things in life though:). Big hugs xoxo

BadPenny said...

I've noticed that - parents' faces set & grim with smiling babies...

The baddies have to come from some where. The boys stealing bikes for payment with drugs in our village have non smiling parents.

I have a friend struggling with grief who talks about mindfulness which works on a good day for her.

I like to notice things. I think I have a busy mind but perhaps I am being mindful.

Fingers crossed for you.

MunirGhiasuddin said...

We look at a pair of Swans every day. Even if my daughter is upset about something and is venting to me she will stop talking until I drive past the lake where we see the swans.

auntiegwen said...

I know exactly what you mean, when I was a teacher I was always saying they were all babies once and then their life happened to them xxx

broken biro said...

Thanks for the reminder about mindfulness - I'm trying to do that more!

Re the baby - a bright, lovely teenage girl came into the library the other day and chatted to my colleague and I nicely. After she'd gone my colleague said they'd really worried about her as a very young child - she seemed neglected with dodgy bad-attitude parents. But still she appears to have come through that with good character... all is not necessarily lost!

Unknown said...

very nice,thanks for sharing.

Something I wrote earlier...

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